Butt-Head Bandit

When we arrived home today, Bandit the butthead sheep decided he would revisit his antics of last summer wherein he lies in wait at the front driveway gate and goes bursting through when we open it to get in the yard. This was not and is not nearly as funny as he seems to think it is.

And of course, he bee-lined immediately for the corn field, looking to help himself to a few juicy stalks. We have a great relationship with farmer who owns the land around us and I was not about to let a jackass sheep ruin that.

I knew from past experience that Bandit cannot be chased back in—he finds it thrilling if we start to follow him. I honestly think it gives him an ego boost—because, why, he Bandit is now the leader of the herd! We are following! He gets to choose the way! Such fun, such adventure, let’s all gooooooooo!

I have no interest in Bandit led adventures (which would only turn out badly, this is after all the sheep that got stuck in a tomato cage and nearly died) and so it always ends up with me bribing him back with a bucket of grain. Last summer, this happened so often that I started keeping a “Bandit Bucket” in the car, it just made life easier. This time, however, I didn’t want to lose valuable corn-nibbling time by going to the barn for a bucket and so instead, I raided the trunk of the car which happened to be full of groceries. And lucky for me, one staple item I picked up today was a big canister of oatmeal, which not only makes the appropriate rattling grain bucket noise but is roughly shaped like a bucket as well.

Bandit, ever the fool for food, promptly ran back inside where he belonged. It is in my best interest to keep his bucket interest high so he got his nibble of oatmeal as well. But a new problem had developed in that the other sheep plus the horses in the adjacent pasture had also answered the call of the bucket and I was now surrounded by a jostling mob of creatures who felt quite strongly about what should happen next, namely that I should feed them.

And so it is that I no longer have plans to make oatmeal cookies tonight as I no longer have any oatmeal. 😕

Time to start keeping a “Bandit Bucket” in the car again...